Here's to the state of Tucker Carlson
For overtop your borders, the devil builds no walls
If you poke inside his closet, a hundred bodies fall
With squinting incantations, the murderpigs absolved
A land of mixing colors, is no country at all
Whoa here's to the land you've torn out the heart of
Tucker Carlson find yourself another country to be part of

And here's to the people of Tucker Carlson
Who watch their vaunted hero fulminating every night
At anyone who uplifts anyone who isn't white
Who lob a million death threats and challenges to fight
Who're quick to rage against anything but the dying of the light
Whoa here's to the land you've torn out the heart of
Tucker Carlson find yourself another country to be part of

And here's to the schools of Tucker Carlson
Where YouTube sophists lecture on why they don't have to care
All the rudiments of hatred are present everywhere
And every publication is a wealth of factual error
And systemic injustice, well they just call that fair
Whoa here's to the land you've torn out the heart of
Tucker Carlson find yourself another country to be part of

And here's to the cops of Tucker Carlson
They're hiding nazi tattoos as they lock the prison door
Their bellies bounce inside them when they knock you to the floor
And they'll take plenty prisoners in their private prison war
Behind their broken badges, there are murderers and more
Whoa here's to the land you've torn out the heart of
Tucker Carlson find yourself another country to be part of

And here's to the judges of Tucker Carlson
Who hide their flasks of whiskey as they stumble into court
Submit their drunken ruling on the freedom to abort
Oh, justice is a stranger when the justices report
In overturning science, the judgment's always short
Whoa here's to the land you've torn out the heart of
Tucker Carlson find yourself another country to be part of

And here's to the government of Tucker Carlson
With a chief who bought his ego using all his self control
Attempt to check his power, it's advisor whack-a-mole
To sate his egomania, there's a pig for every role
He gets to play avenger, and we all pay the toll
Whoa here's to the land you've torn out the heart of
Tucker Carlson find yourself another country to be part of

And here's to the laws of Tucker Carlson
Complaining that the fight has been brought to his house's door
Despite calling for the same in the segment just before
With ICE agents arresting whole families by the score
Be thankful it was shouting, and it was nothing more
Whoa here's to the land you've torn out the heart of
Tucker Carlson find yourself another country to be part of

And here's to the churches of Tucker Carlson
On a table in a trailer with a fender caked in rust
The screen broadcasts his sermons that pander to their lust
The orange on his countenance is a designer dust
And they worship at an altar chiseled with mistrust
Whoa here's to the land you've torn out the heart of
Tucker Carlson find yourself another country to be part of